Monday, November 22nd, 2021
It’s been a long week, and I’ve had to remind myself on multiple occasions to unlock my jaw and take a deep breath. It appears life is back to maximum schedule overload again, and the COVID-19 pause is over. Between work, trying to write the next bestseller, hockey tournaments, visiting dignitaries, and the active teenager social life, even our weekend was chaos.
Admiral Meemaw visited the S.S. Shitshow this weekend, along with her two smallest minions. They sailed south for an inspection of our fine vessel, and I’m confident that we passed, although perhaps not with flying colours. The minions left spoiled and perhaps a little overtired, and Meemaw left with a sore back.
Unfortunately, the ship's guest bunks were reported to be less than sufficient. It appears our old pull-out sofa isn’t the most supportive. I can’t imagine how she could possibly not find it comfortable—it can’t be more than 15 years old and still has lots of life left. Also, the ship's operating temperatures were reported to be a bit chilly. It appears roles have officially been reversed, and I'm now the one telling her to put a sweater on.
However, I did anticipate a small level of dissatisfaction and therefore planned ahead. I denied Relic leave this weekend to head ashore as we needed all hands on deck. The Duchess got a pass as she was away all weekend at a hockey tournament, so it was up to Relic to pick up the slack and pull double duty. I’ve rewarded him with some extra car privileges this week for all his hard work. Meemaw sure does love torturing—I mean, spending quality time with her grandkids—and far be it from me to deny my superior officer that joy. There were board games, family dinners, snuggles, and embarrassing meet-and-greets with the crew's friends.
She also loves to bring supplies when she visits, which, of course, we love. Meemaw always buys the best treats. But the best gifts are always the cast-offs that she buys for herself, only then to decide she doesn’t like them, therefore “gifting” them to us. I reminded her that the local charity shop is now accepting donations once again and that perhaps next time she could make a donation to them instead. The reply I received was a very stern look; she did not appreciate my tone. So, I am now the proud owner of 500 cloth face masks that don’t fit properly. It's a good thing that Number 2 is always looking for rags in the garage.
The Minions were beyond thrilled to be visiting for the weekend, and Number 2 was equally excited to have his two favourite nephews here. I think he’s missed the lazy afternoons hanging out with tiny humans. He misses building Lego masterpieces, tackling small jobs with helpers, and tormenting me with Nerf bullets and fart jokes. I too have missed the snuggles, sweet kisses, and even the fart jokes. However, I haven’t missed the pee on the seats, unfinished apples, stepping on Lego shards, and the 20 questions before the coffee kicks in. That being said, I’d happily step on Lego every day if it meant I got to see more of them. It's so hard when family lives far away. Parenting teens and adjusting to family transitions with sibling dynamics have made this period particularly challenging yet rewarding.
Despite the chaos and the Lego wounds, it was a perfect weekend at sea.
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