Captain’s Log
Wednesday, April 26th, 2023
The weather this weekend was perfect for cracking the whip and getting some inside chores done that we’ve been avoiding. The ship has been neglected lately and the chaos was getting a little carried away. It was all hands on deck. Thankfully last night our neighbours came over and gave us the push we needed to give the kitchen a good clean. Nothing like having company come over to light a fire under your ass to clean up. I pride myself on my ability to fake being a domestic goddess when I know we are having company.
This afternoon I decided to drop anchor and let the ship just drift. The entire crew took the opportunity to sneak away to a quiet corner and enjoy the rainy afternoon alone. I grabbed a new book, and a cozy blanket and snuggled up for a lazy afternoon. Unfortunately, I napped so hard that I woke up and wasn’t sure what year it was. Now I have a nap hangover and any motivation that I was riding in the morning has vanished. I’m so disappointed in myself, I am an expert napper, and I can’t believe I made such a rookie mistake by failing to set an alarm.
Relic has been home since Tuesday, having completed his first year of university, back for the summer to stock up the coffers ( and deplete mine) before September. Last week was definitely the honeymoon stage as I fawned over how grown up he seems. I caught him doing his own laundry, and actually folding it. Number 2 and I congratulated each other on a job well done raising such a fine young adult. Fast forward 5 days and he seems to have readjusted to home life, forgetting all the skills he acquired over the last 8 months. I was given a pile of laundry so large I'm not convinced he didn't make it his personal mission to use every item of clothing he owned so that I could wash it.
Usage of glassware and bowls have gone up 200% in the last 5 days as well which tells me he is the culprit. We’ve also had to remind him he’s not on an unlimited meal plan here and that the multiple breakfasts and lunches are going to have to come to an end. My god I’ve forgotten how much food that kid can consume. I swear he just unlocks his jaw and pours it down packaging and all.
The Duchess is thrilled to have her brother back as this means she will no longer be the sole focus of her commanding officers and is hopeful she can return to her life flying under the radar. If the last 5 days are an indicator I think she is in luck. The boy is certainly my endless source of content for this blog.
cohabitation negotiations have commenced between the crew. The Duchess has laid down the law regarding shared bathroom etiquette. She has implemented a zero-tolerance rule for dirty laundry being left on the floor as well as detailed instructions on how to lower the toilet seat. She has also designated the trash can as the disposable point for contact lenses, changing it from the former bathroom counter.
Relic countered with a list of his own demands, including taking down a large portion of the new floral decor adorning the walls, limiting the amount of skin care products on the counter, and allowing him one of the four drawers. Neither is agreeable to either’s terms and both are back at the negotiation table. Number 2 and I have decided it’s best if we just sit back and watch the chaos unfold. The next couple of weeks should prove interesting as we all get back to living under one roof.
Looking forward to Monday, Relic will no longer be riding the unemployment train and I won’t be funding his not so starving student lifestyle. However, I am not looking forward to playing musical cars for the next 4 months.
Tarren is a millennial momma of two teenagers, a wife, and a creative, nap queen with a habit of being an oversharer. Tarren loves curating and engaging in conversations about the highs and lows of motherhood, the ever-evolving stages of womanhood, marriage and the fast-approaching reality of being empty-nesters.
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